Team quotes, sometimes referred to as funny credits, are a list of interesting quotes from the developers of Fallout 2 that can be accessed at any time by shift-clicking the Credits button.
Fallout 2[]
@Quotes from the Fallout 2 team:
(Press ESC if you don't want to see some raw language)
Wanna see my tool?
- Nick
I saw where you stuck it.
- Scotty
I ain't never had nothing that big.
- T. Ray
Do you want to touch and feel the real thing?
- Courtney
Most people don't have a 22 inch hole.
- Tim
I am not going to do the prostitute today.
- Tim
I can't help it! There are two holes down here
and it won't fit in one of them!
- Scotty
Can you keep track of how many times you have sex in the engine?
- Chris A.
There's nothing wrong with Barney...I can't believe I just said that!
- Chris T.
If you want, I'll go whip out my 19-inch.
- Jesse
I stick lots of things in my mouth I probably shouldn't.
- Scotty
I'm beginning to feel that marketing people are the bane of the
universe. I used to think it was lawyers.
- Anonymous
It didn't strike me as odd that you were making duck noises. It
struck me as odd that I *didn't* find it odd that you were making
duck noises.
- Fred H.
I haven't touched it all morning!
- Tom F.
Then you're gonna get spanked!
- Fred H.
Let me guess, you need a kleenex again?
- Rob H.
That thing has an unpleasantness about it that is not readily apparent.
Bring in the others...I wish to taste of their unsavoriness as well.
- Matt N.
Yes, I am a loser.
- Scotty
I'm sorry, my computer is going to be "meowing" for the next
five minutes.
- Jesse
How did I do that? I made it bigger!
- Nick
I'm kinda anal about this... I'm anal about everything...
I'M ANAL MAN!!
- Scotty
There's a big difference between Thanksgiving and Burger King.
- Mark H.
It's a good idea not to do anything wrong.
- Scotty
I got a sheep. What can I do with a sheep?
- Scotty
I think Chris A. has sex...stuff.
- Rob H.
Jesse flashes people every day...
- Rob H.
Scotty, you're better than a random fractal.
- Anonymous
I LOVE sheep!
- Greg B.
I stick other things in my mouth as well...
- Feargus
I'm not really interested in going...unless we're gonna do a
lot of penetration.
- Dave
Yeah, you should see the tape...
- Fred
Sleeping is *way* better than moving.
- Nick
You look up SUCK and you'll see my name, address and previous
convictions.
- John D.
- I* think it's worth a dollar for 3 days of day-dreaming.
- Fred
We have to put the whores in, so the player has someone to
wake up next to, if they don't sleep with Jenny.
- Matt
Are there any scripts you can have sex with?
- Tom
I was aiming it at his crotch and it kept going off.
- Jesse
I'll never get away from that, nor from the panties.
- Nick
I can't get Jenny to talk after having sex with her.
- Nick
Well, I can always cut his nose off and look...
- Jesse
I...I...I have no one to be bitter against.
- Nick
I hearby establish that Wednesday is cock day.
- Feargus
Man, are *you* white.
- T-Ray
I got 2 kisses and some other things.
- Fred H.
I'd rather see that than a WonderBra (tm) convention.
- Tom
Size doesn't matter to me.
- Rob H.
Please create on me.
- Matt N.
I had Darren tonight, and I wanted to make sure that if
anything went wrong I could bring it back.
- Scotty
If you want to see Godzilla's penis, go into Tom F.'s
office.
- John D.
Everytime you touch that keyboard, it's like you're
touching me.
- Chris A.
Gary's here, but he's not around.
- Scotty
Well, that's just what he said. I don't know if that's
the case, since he's English and not to be trusted. Of
course, *I* am English.
- Feargus
I meant "snatch" in the sense of "to pilfer."
- Chris A.
Jesse's more of an expert on how drugs work.
- Nick
I have no idea where I am going to stuff them.
- Feargus
I'm not hungry, but I should eat because I don't have
any food at home.
- Nick
What is your obsession with Dilbert and nudity?
- Evan C.
User error! User Error! I proved you don't know how
to use a stapler! Now stay away from my tape
dispenser.
- Scotty
Ow! Not my hairy arm!
- Scotty
You put the 'b' in subtle.
- Colin
Because it's my ass. You *all* share my ass!
- Feargus
I'm sunburned so bad it's not even funny, and I just
touched myself!
- John D.
Did you see Tom with the sheep last night? He was a
God! I never saw anyone handle sheep so well.
- Jesse
Nick is tough and wiry...like bad jerky.
- Chris A.
What is it about a product cycle that makes me want
to cry?
- Chris A.
You want him 'puppetized'?
- Rob H.
That almost looks like my tickle-tickle wiggle-wiggle
thing.
- Jeremey B.
I don't have time for your diction.
- Chris A.
Keep singing, Nick...Jess...Who *are* you?
- Gary
Cancer, stay away from my penis!
- Tom F.
I blame your grandparents for even having your
parents.
- Tom F.
I feel a lot better about the project when I'm in
denial.
- Scotty
How am I going to get my head out of there?
- Scotty
Hatch: An advanced formula for pain.
- Scotty
I was pretty good with sheep from the beginning.
- Dave
I couldn't find my ferret this morning, that's why
I was late.
- Gary
Scotty -- He's our dongle.
- Chris A.
Why is yours so much bigger than mine? Oh, it's
zoomed in.
- Jesse
Clothes I can do without!
- Zeb
What is the deal with the homing, exploding
brahmin?
- Greg B.
Here's your scissors. Take them before I stab
Colin with them.
- Tom F.
See, I even censor myself!
-Feargus
Like I said last night, it has nothing to do
with being limber.
- Fred H.
I don't need to see dismembered naked women.
Well...never mind.
- Greg B.
I'm doing the president tonight.
- Fred H.
I'm slow...'cause I don't know what I'm doing!
- Gary P.
I can come by and slap it in for you...
- Eric Pribish
At the first sign of trouble I'm going to run
for cover like a little girl.
- Fred H.
If it has the right data, then it will just
automatically work!
- Jesse R.
I'm going to show you what it's like to be
stabbed in the eye and die.
- Nick K.
I love the way you tighten when you laugh.
- Matt N.
Do you just pump it to shoot?
- Dave H.
My brain was removed completely intact.
- Dave H.
Dan has a martian that's much cleaner.
- Nick K.
Explain to me how eating a gallon of
boogers is a philosophical question.
- John D.
Is it possible to make drugs have
- serious* side-effects?
- Nick K.
I don't see this as a problem. The rats
go "squee".
- Matt N.
The cows go "moo", the dogs go "arf, arf".
- Chris J. (The REAL one)
I was amazed at how small I could get it.
- Scotty
It's still the biggest one we got. We
might be able to handle it.
- Fred
Nick's right, sleeping *is* way better
than moving.
- Jesse R.
Ooooh, can I choke the dragon?
- Dave H.
I'd like to pop her with a sunbolt.
- Dave H.
Did you get your little thingy to do it?
- Feargus
Would you like half a glass of Demo?
- Scotty
They're talking about juicing Mark's cat.
That can't be good.
- Jesse R.
I seem to be doing better as a woman.
- Chad A.
Yeah, *I'll* make it sore.
- Scotty
Don't give Sulik flares, cause he'll
chuck them like the President's seed.
- Dany M.
I was whacking Big Jesus, and I have
something to show you.
- Chris A.
I'll talk to Chad, he's married Sulik
many times.
- Nick K.
We're not dealing with rocket scientists
here. We're dealing with computer game
players.
- Chris A.
I say we delete it all and start over.
- Chris H.
I can't imitate Nick's voice. I'm too
manly.
- Rodney S.
I think that goes beyond the normal
attraction most men have for sticky notes.
- Greg B.
I'm going to go fuck Rob Right now. He
deserves it.
No, you don't understand, he helped me so
much there. He did the trunk thing.
- Dan S.
I'm going to flash them first, then I will
use the wand.
- Dave H.
Uh-oh. They're making squirrel noises
again.
- Feargus
What is the sound a naked squirrel makes?
- Dan S.
You wouldn't give me a happy face for
Gecko, so I gave myself one.
- Nick K.
I hate that when you people stab me in
the eye with a fork.
- Fred H.
I like to look. It's fascinating to me.
- Dave H.
I wanna be a queen.
- Doug A.
Yeah, that's why the bounty hunters
turned into fruit tables, too.
- Jesse R.
Your dad sure has a sweet ass.
- Tom F.
Go outside, there's a rat on the street.
It's a cheat rat.
- Tom F.
Excuse while I squeek a bit until we get
warmed up.
- Dan S.
Go now or forever hold Ed's penis.
- Tom F.
The first time I tried it, I was on my
back all day.
- Chris H.
We are going to be on display like
cattle.
- Dave H.
Not only can I do art, but I'm a
professional stripper on the side.
- Scotty
I'm hungry 'cause I'm a pig.
- Fred H.
I'm kinda bummed I'm not in the quote
file.
- Captain Victory
Have you seen my crack? It's right there.
It's huge.
- Dave H.
Even if this code was working right, it would
still be broken.
- Chris H.
I'm never going to mention bodily functions again.
- Matt N.
Still missing two balls?
- Dave H.
I just saw a brahmin poop!
- Ed H.
I'm a marsupial by night.
- Tom F.
I need to inspect your pouch.
- Matt N.
Rat soccer; games QA plays.
- Jesse R.
Yeah, well don't believe everything you read in
the design docs.
- Chris A.
He was walking around and all of a sudden he
was nude.
- Jesse R.
Do you mind if I piss in your wastebasket?
- Greg B.
Now you're absolutely sure there's no sex
going on here, right?
- Chris A.
Get your fingers out of my box!
- Jeremy B.
Let me stick this in and then I'll show it to
you.
- Scotty
Oops, the orgy has been broken up.
- Tom F.
The closer we get to shipping, the more like
Jim Morrison you get.
- Gary P.
Yes, I agree, the frog *does* look more
sophisticated with only one pineapple.
- Jesse R.
Could you look at the cowardly brahmin AI
packet when you get the chance? It's
fighting back with me.
- Tom F.
Have you played with explosives yet today,
Greg?
- Dennis P.
I feel like one of those fish that has the
leeches all over it.
-Scotty
Why is yours in such good condition? Is it
'cause you never use it?
- Jesse R.