Published Feb 1st, 2014, 2/1/14 12:00 pm
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Meanwhile back at the harbour George was discussing things he would like on his 'Pirate Ship'.
"Oh, and by the way." George said examining the small yacht. "I want some guns on this baby. A lot of them."
The two opposite men listen hard to this. They were going to be rich and only for the cost of a small little yacht.
"Of course, that will cost more." the bigger man boomed.
George ran over to his car he had park-- crashed into the harbour. He pulled out two massive bags of gold and one brown sac of cash.
"Is this enough to get some guns mounted on the front, back and sides?" George asked the two men.
The smaller man began to drool. Upon realising this the bigger man slapped him backed into action.
"You are like sick, demented, clown, angel sent from heaven to grant out prayers!" the bigger man said.
"I could kiss you!" the smaller man said reaching out and hugging George.
George pushed the smaller man back.
"Not really comfortable with that but ok…"
Later that day when the yacht was ready for boarding, and Ben arrived everyone packed their bags.
"Dammit, Ben, no kissing!" George pushed Ben's lips back.
Ben fell back a little.
"Im sorry Mr. George it's just…That is the most raddest pirate ship ever!"
George turned his hands into the peace symbol.
"Word." he said boarding his ship.
When the two got onto the yacht George went scrummaging in a chest he found below deck.
"Perfect!" he cried.
George came back up to the poop deck. Hehe poop. George was holding a green parrot costume. It had green feathers from top to bottom.
"What's a pirate captain without his parrot, aye Ben?" George laughed tossing the costume to Ben. "You'll be my pimptastic parrot!"
The two friends gave each other a high five.
"Ima be the best parrot ever!" Ben cried.
George took out a massive stick he somehow fit in his pants and wacked Ben on the head with it.
"From now on your my parrot. So you speak in parrot talk. Like. 'SQUARK I'm a parrot'.
Ben put the parrot head on.
"SQUARK let's go!"
Five weeks later…
Ben lay on the deck of the yacht burning in his costume. George sat on a deck chair next to him with a ukulele (The awesome hawaiian guitar.) singing sea songs. Eventually he ended up singing 'Under The Sea'. That drove Ben mad.
"'Deh fish on teh land ain't happy, 'cus they in the big mans bo--." George was cut off singing his song.
Ben pointed with a weary finger at a beach.
"LAND HO!" he cried out.
George wacked Ben with the bamboo stick.
"Bad parrot! You don't talk like a human, do you?"
"SQUARK, why are we here Mr. George?" Ben said reaching for the edge of the boat.
Ben puked into the water.
"I think I have scurvy." Ben said wearily.
George, again, smashed Ben's head in.
"How do you know that? Are you a doctor?" George asked. "Anyway, we're here because a while ago the owner of this island built a bunch of real private hotels. Really private and stuff. Well today he opens the casino. He's gonna take all of his money for the casino from a armoured truck into the vault. We're gonna intercept them and steal the money! Like pirates!"
Ben stumbled around a bit.
"But your filthy rich. Why do you need more money?" Ben asked reaching for the edge of the boat again.
Again George bashed the bamboo onto Ben's head.
"Never ask me that question again, Ben."
Eventually the two got to the shore of the island after anchoring the ship.
"I really need a doctor." Ben said shaking. "I have spots all over my face."
George lifted Ben off the rowing boat.
"Let's ask that guy over there." George said pointing at a man.
We wore very tight leopard pants and he wasn't tanned at all. Sheesh.
"Hey, you!" George cried out to him.
"Frenchety french french." he spoke in french…
What a douche. I bet he speaks fluent English!
Let's be sure to pirate the hell outta that guy!
The two began to walk along the beach until they came to a tour guide stall.
"Hey you! Have you seen a vet around here?" George asked the tour guide.
She had dark shades on and had blonde hair.
"Over to the right a while." she replied.
George looked to his left.
"That's your left." said Ben pointing George in the right direction. "And I need a real doctor!"
George banged his fist against the tour guide's booth.
"Why didn't you just point to it! Im not that smart!" he shouted to her.
"Because Im blind." she replied.
George began laughing. Ben spoke up.
"But your a tour guide!"
The woman replied by stepping out of the booth with a guide stick.
"Holy crap you really are blind!"
Suddenly a large bang could be heard from the sea outside the island. The French man George asked for direction cried out:
"PIRATEES!"
I knew he spoke English!
"I know right…Wait we're supposed to be the pirates here." cried out George.
George pointed to the woman at the tour booth.
"You! Blind lady! Your my new navigator!" he said.
"We're the only pirates 'round here these parts!" he added. "And we take down any other pirates!"
"Oh, and by the way." George said examining the small yacht. "I want some guns on this baby. A lot of them."
The two opposite men listen hard to this. They were going to be rich and only for the cost of a small little yacht.
"Of course, that will cost more." the bigger man boomed.
George ran over to his car he had park-- crashed into the harbour. He pulled out two massive bags of gold and one brown sac of cash.
"Is this enough to get some guns mounted on the front, back and sides?" George asked the two men.
The smaller man began to drool. Upon realising this the bigger man slapped him backed into action.
"You are like sick, demented, clown, angel sent from heaven to grant out prayers!" the bigger man said.
"I could kiss you!" the smaller man said reaching out and hugging George.
George pushed the smaller man back.
"Not really comfortable with that but ok…"
Later that day when the yacht was ready for boarding, and Ben arrived everyone packed their bags.
"Dammit, Ben, no kissing!" George pushed Ben's lips back.
Ben fell back a little.
"Im sorry Mr. George it's just…That is the most raddest pirate ship ever!"
George turned his hands into the peace symbol.
"Word." he said boarding his ship.
When the two got onto the yacht George went scrummaging in a chest he found below deck.
"Perfect!" he cried.
George came back up to the poop deck. Hehe poop. George was holding a green parrot costume. It had green feathers from top to bottom.
"What's a pirate captain without his parrot, aye Ben?" George laughed tossing the costume to Ben. "You'll be my pimptastic parrot!"
The two friends gave each other a high five.
"Ima be the best parrot ever!" Ben cried.
George took out a massive stick he somehow fit in his pants and wacked Ben on the head with it.
"From now on your my parrot. So you speak in parrot talk. Like. 'SQUARK I'm a parrot'.
Ben put the parrot head on.
"SQUARK let's go!"
Five weeks later…
Ben lay on the deck of the yacht burning in his costume. George sat on a deck chair next to him with a ukulele (The awesome hawaiian guitar.) singing sea songs. Eventually he ended up singing 'Under The Sea'. That drove Ben mad.
"'Deh fish on teh land ain't happy, 'cus they in the big mans bo--." George was cut off singing his song.
Ben pointed with a weary finger at a beach.
"LAND HO!" he cried out.
George wacked Ben with the bamboo stick.
"Bad parrot! You don't talk like a human, do you?"
"SQUARK, why are we here Mr. George?" Ben said reaching for the edge of the boat.
Ben puked into the water.
"I think I have scurvy." Ben said wearily.
George, again, smashed Ben's head in.
"How do you know that? Are you a doctor?" George asked. "Anyway, we're here because a while ago the owner of this island built a bunch of real private hotels. Really private and stuff. Well today he opens the casino. He's gonna take all of his money for the casino from a armoured truck into the vault. We're gonna intercept them and steal the money! Like pirates!"
Ben stumbled around a bit.
"But your filthy rich. Why do you need more money?" Ben asked reaching for the edge of the boat again.
Again George bashed the bamboo onto Ben's head.
"Never ask me that question again, Ben."
Eventually the two got to the shore of the island after anchoring the ship.
"I really need a doctor." Ben said shaking. "I have spots all over my face."
George lifted Ben off the rowing boat.
"Let's ask that guy over there." George said pointing at a man.
We wore very tight leopard pants and he wasn't tanned at all. Sheesh.
"Hey, you!" George cried out to him.
"Frenchety french french." he spoke in french…
What a douche. I bet he speaks fluent English!
Let's be sure to pirate the hell outta that guy!
The two began to walk along the beach until they came to a tour guide stall.
"Hey you! Have you seen a vet around here?" George asked the tour guide.
She had dark shades on and had blonde hair.
"Over to the right a while." she replied.
George looked to his left.
"That's your left." said Ben pointing George in the right direction. "And I need a real doctor!"
George banged his fist against the tour guide's booth.
"Why didn't you just point to it! Im not that smart!" he shouted to her.
"Because Im blind." she replied.
George began laughing. Ben spoke up.
"But your a tour guide!"
The woman replied by stepping out of the booth with a guide stick.
"Holy crap you really are blind!"
Suddenly a large bang could be heard from the sea outside the island. The French man George asked for direction cried out:
"PIRATEES!"
I knew he spoke English!
"I know right…Wait we're supposed to be the pirates here." cried out George.
George pointed to the woman at the tour booth.
"You! Blind lady! Your my new navigator!" he said.
"We're the only pirates 'round here these parts!" he added. "And we take down any other pirates!"
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